Moving Forward|
Today calls for a blog post.
I love to help people. It brings me joy.
Sometimes it can be disguised as a constant effort to please, or excitement or far too much intensity. I love to know what people are feeling and what is making them tick. But often times I think it also can be a place where I go too far.
So many times I have taken on the burden of someone else' pain or disappointment because I thought I was helping them out. I thought I was giving them a shoulder to cry on. But I was literally taking their pain and making it my own.
These past two years have been overwhelming. My sweet mother suffered multiple falls, strokes and brain injury. The decision to move in and care for her was not something that was even a debate in my mind. It was instant and calculated. Mom and I spent countless trips back and forth to doctors appointments, trying to find answers to what had happened. I tried to understand the pain and frustration Mom felt as doctors shook their heads in disbelief and left her with no answers. I was physically and emotionally exhausted.
I felt so grateful to have the privilege to take care of her. Our relationship blossomed into something so precious and deep.
I will never look back on those times and live it differently - except for one thing.
The lesson I had to learn from that experience was that I do not do very well to let go of other people's pain. I carry the burden of what others are feeling because I think it will lighten their load. I reach out to them and try to be the hero of their story.
But everyone has their own story.
Each person is given grace to handle their own pain, grief and hurt. My job is not to take that on my shoulders.
I am not a saviour.
So, if you, like me, feel the urge to carry that burden from someone else, on your shoulders....Don't.
Rather invest in those people,
build them up,
encourage them,
pray for them.
And you will find that you not only will breathe new life into their life, but inevitably you will breathe new life into yours.
I love to help people. It brings me joy.
Sometimes it can be disguised as a constant effort to please, or excitement or far too much intensity. I love to know what people are feeling and what is making them tick. But often times I think it also can be a place where I go too far.
So many times I have taken on the burden of someone else' pain or disappointment because I thought I was helping them out. I thought I was giving them a shoulder to cry on. But I was literally taking their pain and making it my own.
These past two years have been overwhelming. My sweet mother suffered multiple falls, strokes and brain injury. The decision to move in and care for her was not something that was even a debate in my mind. It was instant and calculated. Mom and I spent countless trips back and forth to doctors appointments, trying to find answers to what had happened. I tried to understand the pain and frustration Mom felt as doctors shook their heads in disbelief and left her with no answers. I was physically and emotionally exhausted.
I felt so grateful to have the privilege to take care of her. Our relationship blossomed into something so precious and deep.
I will never look back on those times and live it differently - except for one thing.
The lesson I had to learn from that experience was that I do not do very well to let go of other people's pain. I carry the burden of what others are feeling because I think it will lighten their load. I reach out to them and try to be the hero of their story.
But everyone has their own story.
Each person is given grace to handle their own pain, grief and hurt. My job is not to take that on my shoulders.
I am not a saviour.
So, if you, like me, feel the urge to carry that burden from someone else, on your shoulders....Don't.
Rather invest in those people,
build them up,
encourage them,
pray for them.
And you will find that you not only will breathe new life into their life, but inevitably you will breathe new life into yours.
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