Honesty|
February. The month where we have begun to recover from our overspending Christmas shopping sprees, where we are gazing out our windows and longing for the fresh smell of spring, a month where a sentimental man-made holiday promises red roses, cheap chocolate and romantic gestures of love.
February feels like a "waiting room" type of month for me. Like I can hear the whistle of spring around the bend, beckoning me to stand from my seat, grab my bag and begin my journey. Winter tends to bring me musings of waiting, pondering and a pensive version of myself. But, let's be honest. I'm always pensive, over thinking and dissecting conversations, moments and feelings. In a perfect moment, I appreciate this way of thinking,but I often find it to be disheartening and overwhelming.
I had a conversation with a kind someone the other day, discussing our lack of honesty within society. Yes, we can be honest. But often, it is at the expense of someone else and leaves us feeling unaffected, or better yet, superior. But what is most difficult to do, and this is for me personally, is to be honest about my shortcomings.
I find it difficult when people idolize me, and speak highly of my "good traits". Don't misunderstand me, every appreciates the pat of an ego. But I think that the downfall of being an introvert is that you have this ongoing battle inside your mind. People interpret you a certain way, but you know that your thoughts and dreams are different then how they see it. I am very aware of my weaknesses, vices and unloving thoughts.
I can be selfish, unkind, unfit, impatient,cruel,and ungrateful. But, what I am learning, and I am far from "arriving", is realizing that the entire motive in loving yourself, is loving yourself COMPLETELY. Warts and all.
My prayer for this next season of my life, is to be more grateful, more kind, more loving and forgiving of myself.
I pray that forgiveness will be something that I allow to flow from my fingertips, that grace will sit on my shoulders, kindness with rest on my lips, faith will live in my heart and love will touch all.
Remember friend.Love yourself.Warts and all.
February feels like a "waiting room" type of month for me. Like I can hear the whistle of spring around the bend, beckoning me to stand from my seat, grab my bag and begin my journey. Winter tends to bring me musings of waiting, pondering and a pensive version of myself. But, let's be honest. I'm always pensive, over thinking and dissecting conversations, moments and feelings. In a perfect moment, I appreciate this way of thinking,but I often find it to be disheartening and overwhelming.
I had a conversation with a kind someone the other day, discussing our lack of honesty within society. Yes, we can be honest. But often, it is at the expense of someone else and leaves us feeling unaffected, or better yet, superior. But what is most difficult to do, and this is for me personally, is to be honest about my shortcomings.
I find it difficult when people idolize me, and speak highly of my "good traits". Don't misunderstand me, every appreciates the pat of an ego. But I think that the downfall of being an introvert is that you have this ongoing battle inside your mind. People interpret you a certain way, but you know that your thoughts and dreams are different then how they see it. I am very aware of my weaknesses, vices and unloving thoughts.
I can be selfish, unkind, unfit, impatient,cruel,and ungrateful. But, what I am learning, and I am far from "arriving", is realizing that the entire motive in loving yourself, is loving yourself COMPLETELY. Warts and all.
My prayer for this next season of my life, is to be more grateful, more kind, more loving and forgiving of myself.
I pray that forgiveness will be something that I allow to flow from my fingertips, that grace will sit on my shoulders, kindness with rest on my lips, faith will live in my heart and love will touch all.
Remember friend.Love yourself.Warts and all.
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