Comparison|

"Comparison is the thief of joy"

Have you ever thought:

"If I lost 10 more pounds, I'd finally be happy."
"If I only didn't grow up the way I did, I'd have more opportunities."
"If I only was prettier or smarter or faster or more outgoing, than people would accept me."

So much of my life has been shrouded by the shadows of comparison. Feeling like I maybe missed the mark or if I worked harder, I'd finally be more acceptable.

You've heard that famous saying about how an illustrious man- with endless degrees and accolades, on his deathbed, looks at his life and realizes that there is nothing more that he wants, than to be surrounded by those he loves.

What if people remembered you for the way they felt around you?
What if people remembered how you touched their lives and influenced their decisions?
What if they remembered how forgiving and loyal you were?
What if they realized that every time they left a conversation with you, they somehow felt inspired?

My teenage years were dark. I was in constant state of debilitating self-comparison. It would swallow me alive and cause me years of anxiety. I used my eating as a way to feel a sense of control-thinking, "Maybe if I'm thinner, they will accept me." "Maybe if I fit into these size 5 jeans, than I would be loveable."

What does all this mean, really. Why share your story with such candidness?

See, the truth is that our shadows follow us. They creep up in moments of joy, sorrow, fear, accomplishment. I literally took a picture of myself this morning and started to rip myself apart in my head.

I hope you understand that the way I speak to myself, I would never utter those words to another soul. I would never speak so harshly, so brashly and so unforgivingly to others then how I do to myself.

But why is that acceptable?
Why is it ok to degrade myself and allow those old shadows to engulf me?

Here's something I want to leave today with, even just a reminder to myself.

You, today, as you are, in whatever way you come-are loveable. You are fierce, you are kind, you are ENOUGH.

Run from the shadows of comparison. No longer allow the shade of comparison dull the shine of who you are.

Maya Angelou has the best quote to end this post,

"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel."